It was all too raw on Wednesday, so we did nothing but let it sink in and be a support to one another.
Yesterday, M began jobhunting in earnest. He was hampered by a sinus attack which set in on Wednesday morning and has yet to let up its grip, but he carried on regardless. It slows him down and dulls his responses, but we don’t have the luxury of him resting until it goes away. He made phone calls to several of the companies who interviewed in back in October — some had moved on and had nothing to offer, but one is still hiring and asked him to re-apply. At their request, we filled out their online application form last night after the girls had gone to bed — starting at 9pm, we finally finished it at 2am. M collapsed into bed. I couldn’t sleep and laid in the dark, staring at nothing for another two hours.
Today, M was up early making calls. When he woke me up, he was beginning to lose his cool. He screwed his face up and then buried it in my shoulder. “I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t want my girls growing up here where…” His voice broke and he pulled me into him hard so his face was deeper in my shoulder, hidden from my gaze, “…where people are so vulnerable. You don’t take a job for the job, you take it for the insurance. It might be a job you hate. It might not pay enough, but you take it so your kids aren’t uninsured! What is wrong with these people that they live like this?!?” So many of the companies M spoke to offer insurance to the employee, but did not cover the family. On the starting wages he is looking at, private insurance costs for us would be crippling.
My mother and I are taking the girls out now — I don’t know where, but just out from under M’s feet, so he can make more calls, try to follow more leads. His sinuses will not let up and give him a break. But, then, neither will our circumstances.
Stumble it!
Those of us fortunate enough to have socialized health-care often forget how much of a burden a simple visit to the doctor can be. I didn’t hesitate to make an appointment for my doctor to check out a nagging problem with my hand, but I guess is wouldn’t be so easy if we had to foot the actual bill.
My heart goes out to you, Strawberry.
Just now reading your bad news, and to say “I’m so sorry ” somehow falls short of actually helping suggest a solution.
Keep your options open, and pound that pavement (or unemployment office), there HAS to be something out there worthy of your talents and expertise.
To quote:
{ Tough times never last, but tough people do }….
The very best of luck to you both!
Hello,
I have been reading your blog. I do want to say how sorry I am. I can empathize a little, as we were in a similar situation, except in the UK, the first time we moved there- my husband was made redundant (the company folded) after we had been in the UK for about 6 months. We had no other family–we had moved there for the job. We ended up moving to Ireland for a couple of years, then back home. We have now been in the UK for 3 years again, but are moving back home this summer.
On the issue of insurance, most companines in the US offer a greatly reduced premium for the employee and for the family at a higher rate. I do not know of any companies that refuse to insure spouses or families, and I’ve been in healthcare/insurance/managed care for 27 years.
I do agree with what a lot of people on the forum said, that it is quicker to get work in the States. Also, Medicaid may not be your only option for some routine healthcare–many churches offer clinics- I know almost all the Catholic churches support free clinics- check out your area.
Hopefully it will work out soon.
All the best
Yes–the lack of healthcare does make people vulnerable doesn’t it? That’s one reason I want to get Canadian citizenship for Kate too–so she always has the option to move relatively easily back to a country with universal healthcare.
I’m going to look at PA and see what other health programs they have.
http://www.healthassociates.com/uninsured.htm
Have you seen this link–a list of services for the uninsured in PA?
If it was absolutely necessary, I bet you could get your girls in the children’s program, and insure yourself with a high deductible through a company like Assurant. Or as someone said, maybe it’s not that much extra to add you on to M’s insurance when he gets a new policy.